Harder days are comeing.

Since Noelle has been putting weight on her legs, all the emotions that I was told I would feel have started to show their ugly faces. When she "stands" on my lap i have noticed that 3 things happen, she either stands on the toe of her right foot or she slants her left leg out to the side or I have to raise my leg up a little. All to make up the difference.

And as I'm typing this, I'm watching Cayla jump around. That also stirs up emotions because Noelle will never be able to do that normally.

We haven't gone to Shriner's yet, but we know all the options. Its just really hard to think of them all.

I pray every night that she will be kept safe in the future and that it gets a little easier for me. And every night, as she is falling asleep, I tell her "no matter what the future holds, mommy will always love you, and no matter how many surgeries, mommy will always be there when you wake up".